Silence

I didn't think I would write today. I didn't think I would ever pick up a pen again. The world just seems so impossible to live in recently. My parents suggest I invite a friend over soon and I couldn't help but wonder, who do I have to invite? All my friends have actual lives and I'm fighting with most of them. It feels like if I were to touch a fire it would freeze me. It feels like every deadly thing I could touch would kill me the wrong way.

I broke down in tears today. I don't know why. I'm the girl with perfect grades, supportive friends, and a stable life. I'm so scared of losing it all. I can feel myself start to slip already. I'm afraid that one day I'll start to not care again.

I want to tell someone. I want to scream it at everyone. It feels like I'm already starting to yell. Nobody is listening. I am silent again.